More than Anything in This World
April 2004
Paris
More than anything in this world
I just want you to be my woman
More than anything in this world
I wanna be your man
Nine long years had passed since Jason last stepped foot on "Le Pont Neuf", the oldest bridge in Paris. Too many memories wrapped around his heart and squeezed it in an iron grip whenever he even thought about the full moon, the bright stars, the lapping water and the old stones. And when he closed his eyes, the sound of his voice always echoed in his mind, mocking him and the decisions he made that changed his life forever.
~**~
April 1995
Le Pont Neuf
Paris, France
Hands entwined, they stood on the oldest bridge in Paris that when its name was translated to English meant "The New Bridge." Above their heads, a luminous full moon sat majestically in the night sky. Stars littered the skyline and their reflections bounced happily in the water below. The night was beautiful, amazing, and it was a night made for lovers.
Swallowing hard, he took her hand and looked into her large, shining brown eyes. His voice was husky with emotion as he spoke to her with his whole heart.
"I will never forget this moment. Standing here with you... I've never been happier or more at peace or more sure of anything. You know, I used to wonder what it would be like to finally fall in love. I wondered how it would change me and sometimes, I didn't think it would ever happen at all.
"I figured I'd be too busy trying to excel at something else and it would pass me right by. Then I looked up one night and you walked into the Nurse's Ball. To say I love you seems so inadequate, but it's the best we've got. I love you, Keesha. With everything I am...I love you."
His hands cupped her face and he kissed her with passion and with love.
~**~
Jason's squeezed his eyes shut lest tears streamed down his chiseled cheeks. He hadn't lied to Keesha that night nine years ago. He hadn't forgotten that moment, and he never would. No matter what she believed or the world believed...that Jason Quartermaine's memories were dead and buried, it simply wasn't true. Those memories were forever etched in Jason's mind regardless of the surname he used, and loving her was something he would never, ever forget.
He didn't know how long he stood there with his eyes closed, and it didn't matter. His time was his and his alone now. His hours were no longer accountable and the FBI no longer dogged his tail. Sonny Corinthos was behind bars and after nine long lonely years, Jason's work was finally done. He was a free man, but it sure as hell didn't feel that way. If anything, it felt like the chains had only tightened around him.
But liberation should have been his. His job was done. He didn't have to lie anymore. He could be the man he wanted to be, but that was hard when he didn't know who that man was. He only knew one thing. Jason didn't want to be alone anymore. He wanted Keesha back in his life again, and now, he had to figure out how to make that happen.
I'd walk through fire
Stand in the rain
I'll go through hell and back
On a plane
I'd scale the mountains
Swim the seas
I beg for mercy
Down on my knees
A breeze blew gently in the spring air and the scent of a familiar perfume wafted to his nostrils. He inhaled greedily and released a deep sigh as the delicious aroma flooded his senses. The fragrance reminded him of Keesha. Usually smelling it would cause an unbearable ache in his chest, but not this time. This time, he allowed himself to simply enjoy it, but when he opened his eyes, he was shocked to see the woman who stood before him.
~**~
More than anything in this world
I just want you to be my woman
More than anything in this world
I wanna be your man
"K-Keesha?" he stammered. He prayed that his eyes didn't deceive him. He wanted to reach out, but he held himself still. His eyes bored into her. "What are you doing here?"
Tears streamed down her supple cheeks as she shook her head. "I don't know. I dreamed about Granny Mae last night and she was standing on this bridge, beckoning to me. I woke up knowing that I had to come, so here I am."
He couldn't bear to see her cry. Knowing that he was partly to blame for her tears hurt him almost as much as the time they'd been apart. His mind screamed at him to look away, but that was the coward's way. If she wasn't ashamed to cry in front of him, he for damn sure wouldn't shame her by turning away. He reached inside his pocket for a handkerchief. He handed it to her and was silent as she wiped her tears and dried her face. When she looked out across the water, he asked, "What are you doing in Paris?"
If she was surprised by his question, she didn't show it. She simply replied, "I needed a break."
"It's beautiful this time of year," he said. The words felt odd. They felt inadequate. He wanted to tell her he loved her still and begged her to take him back. He couldn't do either. Nine years was a long time, and pain and heartache separated them.
I caused you sorrow
I've caused you pain
But love is all we will have to gain
I searched the whole world, oh I
And I want you to be my baby
~**~
"What are you doing here?" she asked without looking at him.
"Paris is beautiful this time of year," he repeated. He stared at her unabashedly, memorizing her features. Without meaning to, he compared her to her younger self and found that the present Keesha was even more effervescent than the one he brought to Paris so many years ago. Once after making love, he told her that her skin was luminous. Now, he found it impossible to find the perfect words to describe her beauty. It was more than skin deep. It surrounded her like a divine halo.
Soft, mystical and glorious.
"I didn't mean the city. I meant this bridge. Why did you come to this bridge, Jason?"
The question stunned him and he found himself momentarily speechless. Dare he tell her the truth? That he came there to ask God for forgiveness and to beg the Higher Power to give her back to him in some shape or form. What would she say to that? Would she remind him of Jason Morgan's past cruelty or would she embrace him with the love she felt for Jason Quartermaine? Damn, this was hard.
"I know that bridges were special to you and Robin," she said, hoarsely with pain evident in her voice. "It's just that... Well, I never expected to find you at this one, that's all." She blinked once as she continued to look at the water. "Did you come here with her, too?"
"No!" he answered quickly and forcefully. "Never!"
Her eyes cut to his. Confusion shone in them and she took a step back. "I'm sorry. It wasn't any of my business. I shouldn't have asked." She looked down at the handkerchief she clutched in her hand. "I'll have my hotel clean this and return it to you. Where should I have them send it?"
"That won't be necessary," he murmured.
She nodded once and turned to move. He opened his mouth. No words came, and she walked away.
~**~
April 1995
Le Pont Neuf
Paris, France
After their kiss ended, Keesha took his hands and looked straight into his eyes. She had something to tell him and it was now his turn to listen to her.
"You're amazing, Jason. I've never met anyone who's so full of so many contradictions. You're clearheaded and rational, yet, you're a hopeless romantic. You're dependable and reliable, yet spontaneous enough to take me to Europe on a moment's notice. You're strong, yet your touch on my body is so tender. I love you, too, Jason. I love you so much."
His chest constricted and then he pulled her to his chest. Their arms closed around each other just as his mouth claimed hers. Later in the hotel, they made love again and made a commitment to be true to their love despite opposition.
~**~
More than anything in this world
I just want you to be my woman
More than anything in this world
I wanna be your man
His mind screamed at him a million things, but none of them made any sense. Jason was paralyzed and nearly senseless. He couldn't believe she was right there and the words to make her stay escaped him. They were free to be together again, but instead of running to him, she was walking away. This couldn't be!
"No!"
Keesha's footsteps paused on the stones. She slowly turned and looked at him. Several feet separated them, but for Jason, the distance didn't matter. She was looking at him again. Really looking, and he thought she really saw him.
"What did you say?"
Confidence returned to him in leaps in bounds. He could do this. He could make this moment happen. Closing the distance, he reached her and said, "I said 'no', but what I meant was don't go. Don't walk away, Keesha. Mary Mae sent you here for a reason. Don't leave until you find out why."
She tilted her head and stared straight into his eyes. "You say that like you know the reason."
He nodded and held out his hand. "I think I do. If you take my hand, I'll tell you."
She took his hand.
[Author's note: 'More Than Anything In This World' can be found on Lenny Kravitz's CD "Mama Said". The dialogue in the flashbacks was directly quoted from the GH episode that aired in April 1995.]
