Ellen glanced quickly at her reflection in the mirror
before leaving her bedroom to answer the front
doorbell ring. Not since she was a teenager did Ellen
remember spending this much time to choose an outfit
for a dinner. In the end she opted for her original
choice, a burgundy v-neck cashmere sweater and a
mid-thigh length, black pleated skirt. For the last
two days Ellen contemplated her relationship with
Kevin and questioned if she had inadvertently sent him
signals that she was interested in a romantic
relationship with him. She concluded she hadn't given
him any such signals, until unfortunately that day
outside of Alan Quartermaine's office. Even now she
had no idea what came over her or why she reacted as
she did to Kevin's admission. However, she intended to
clear up any misunderstanding tonight. For a few
minutes that day, she was taken by surprise and
temporarily loss leave of her senses. Now she was sane
and she and Kevin would calmly and briefly talk about
what happened between them before heading over to
Dara's apartment. Nodding her head as a physical
confirmation that this was a good plan, Ellen opened
the door just as the doorbell rang for a second time.
Her prepared greeting froze on Ellen's lips. Kevin
Collins stood in the hallway holding a beautiful
bouquet of flowers - larkspur, carnations, lilies, and
roses from what Ellen could see. They definitely
weren't something he just picked up at the local
grocery store.
"Hi Ellen, I'm sorry I'm late." Seeing her dumbfounded
stare at the flowers, Kevin held them out and said,
"These are for you. I hope that you like them."
Tentatively, Ellen reached out and accepted the
flowers. Slowly she looked up to see Kevin give her
somewhat shy smile, and she belatedly asked him to
come into the apartment. Upon closing the door Ellen
said, "Kevin, these flowers are lovely, very lovely,
but I can't accept them from you."
Having anticipated this response, Kevin urged Ellen to
accept the flowers. "You like them. I could see it
immediately that you liked them. They're just flowers
Ellen and I just wanted to get you something. Please
keep them."
Refusing the flowers made Ellen feel ungracious and a
bit on the defensive. To turn the tables she asked,
"My friend, are you in the habit of giving flowers to
women who are engaged to be married?"
Hanging his head somewhat, Kevin wasn't particularly
proud of his pursuit of Ellen. But slowly he raised
his eyes looking directly into Ellen's and said, "No.
I've never done anything like this before. You are the
exception Ellen."
Not at all pleased she was starting to become more
nervous as Kevin stood in front of her, Ellen started
her prepared speech, "Kevin, we need to talk...."
Kevin deftly interrupted her, "I agree. But can we
talk after dinner with Mac and Dara tonight? I know
that it's my fault but we're already late. And I'd
feel more comfortable talking after dinner tonight."
"Well, I'd feel 'safer' talking now before we go to
dinner," Ellen shot back silently. Mulling over her
thoughts for a few seconds, Ellen proposed, "Let's
compromise. I am taking a bottle of wine to Dara's
since she and Mac are providing us a free meal. Let's
take the flowers too, o.k.? And we'll talk after the
dinner tonight as you suggest."
Knowing that he needed to choose his battles carefully
with Ellen, Kevin agreed to her suggestion and with
wine and flowers in hand, they headed for Dara's
apartment.
~~~~*~~~~~~
Ellen and Kevin were due to arrive at the apartment
any minute. Mac finished preparing the fresh Italian
salad dressing while Dara stirred the simmering
marinara sauce. "I'm sorry that I didn't get to see
you make your closing argument earlier this week. I
heard you were great." Both Mac and Dara had been
incredibly busy with work during the past week and Mac
had made a special effort to spend more time with
Maxie and Georgie. That left very little time for them
to spend time alone together and Mac was grateful that
Friday had arrived. "What time did the jury start
deliberating today?"
Dara gingerly tasted the sauce and added a few more
bay leaves to the pot. "They really didn't start
deliberating today. The judge didn't finish giving his
instructions to the jury until almost 5:30 tonight so
they won't start deliberating until tomorrow morning.
We really don't expect a verdict in Moreno's trial
this weekend but you never know."
Snaking his arms around Dara's waist as she stood at
the stove, Mac kissed her neck and whispered, "I'm
just glad that it's almost over. You've done a great
job A.D.A. Jensen and you should be proud of
yourself."
Dara turned to face Mac and wrapped her arms around
Mac's neck. "We did a great job. The trial's outcome
would be much less certain if Bannion never
testified." She loved how it felt when she ran her
hand through Mac's hair. After kissing him lightly
Dara smiled, commenting, "We make a pretty good team."
"The best." Mac agreed as he captured Dara's lips in
an unexpectedly sensual kiss. The sound of the
doorbell ringing made them break their kiss and burst
into a fit of laughter.
"Kevin has always had lousy timing," Mac groaned as he
released Dara and headed for the door.
"Kevin has great timing. He probably saved the garlic
bread from being burned!" Dara quickly removed the
bread and meatballs from the oven and joined everyone
in the living room just as Kevin and Ellen finished
removing their heavy coats. Dara thanked their guests
for the wine and she exclaimed how colorful and
beautiful the flowers were. "Where did you guys find
these type of flowers in the middle of winter?" she
queried. "You must have searched the ends of the earth
for them."
Responding first to Dara's question, Kevin looked at
Ellen and said, "They took some time to find; that's
why we're late. But they were well worth getting,
don't you agree Ellen?"
"They are lovely. Dara, let's put them in water and a
vase," Ellen said, speedily heading for the kitchen.
Once Mac and Kevin finished setting the dinner table,
Ellen and Dara brought the meal to the table. As Mac
helped Dara into her seat, Kevin pulled out a chair
for Ellen. She briefly froze but quickly recovered and
she thanked Kevin as she took her seat. The back of
Ellen's hair pressed against Kevin's shirt and his
hand lightly brushed against Ellen's arm as he pushed
in the chair. Ellen shivered and glanced at Kevin's
face to see him swallowing hard. That was the first
physical contact between them that evening and it was
clear that the brief contact affected them both. This
is going to be one LONG evening, she thought
nervously. Kevin took his seat between Dara and Ellen
and asked, "Hey. My ears were burning when we walked
in tonight. What was that comment about me having
great timing all about?" Dara blushed and Mac grinned,
explaining, "Dara was defending you. I had just
remarked that you never had great timing."
Kevin pondered Mac last statement. "That's probably
true. My timing has been terrible at times. Some
things would certainly have been better if I had done
them earlier, but I don't regret doing them," Kevin
said glancing at Ellen and locking eyes with her for a
brief second. "Instead I would have sincerely
regretted not doing them."
Puzzled by Kevin's statements, Mac asked, "What are
you talking about?"
Kevin shook his head ruefully and said, "Nothing. I'm
rambling. What I mean to say is that I hopefully will
have better timing in the future."
"Whatever," Mac said hungrily eyeing the spaghetti.
"Let's eat."
The two couples talked about their week, carefully
avoiding discussion of the T.V. report. Mac had
discussed it with Kevin earlier in the week and no one
felt inclined to put a damper on the evening by
mentioning it again. They instead spoke of politics,
Moreno's trial, and General Hospital gossip. Dara
tried to talk a bit about Matt and Ellen's upcoming
wedding but strangely the mood of the party became
less light-hearted and even, to Dara's surprise, more
strained when the wedding was discussed. She couldn't
put her finger on what was wrong but she was going to
ask Ellen about it in the future when they were alone.
The meal of pasta, sautéed spinach with garlic, salad,
and bread was enjoyed by all. Mac felt that Ellen and
Kevin seemed somewhat tense when they first walked in
the apartment, but now as the meal ended, everyone was
laughing and enjoying themselves. After dinner the
foursome played a fun game of Pictionary, with Mac and
Dara forming one team and Kevin and Ellen forming the
other team. Kevin got the biggest laugh when he drew
the picture of a molar tooth wearing a graduation cap
to represent 'wisdom tooth'. In the end Mac and Dara
won the game. They went to the kitchen to get dessert
and coffee, and once again the atmosphere became
somewhat awkward between Kevin and Ellen, who were
sitting alone in the living room on the couch. Hoping
to ease the tension, Kevin rose from the couch and
looked at some of the photos near the stereo.
Throughout the evening rhythm and blues music had
played pleasantly and lightly in the background on the
digital stereo system. The lack of conversation in the
living room made the music more noticeable and as the
first few bars of the new song played, Ellen murmured
to herself, "Oh, no." Even though she had barely
whispered her dismay, Kevin looked at Ellen and saw
her staring intensely at the stereo, which was next to
him. The tune of the song was good but because of
Ellen's reaction he began to listen to the lyrics -
~~~~~
What's it gonna be
Cuz I can't pretend
Don't you wanna be more than friends
Hold me tight and don't let go
Don't let go
Have the right to lose control
Don't let go
I often tell myself
That we could be more than just friends
I know you think that if we move too soon
It would all end
I live in misery when you're not around
And I won't be satisfied 'till we're taking those vows
There'll be some lovemaking, heartbreaking, soul
shaking
Oh, lovemaking, heartbreaking, soul shaking
~~~~~
Ellen rose from the couch and attempted to change the
radio station when Kevin halted her movement by
grasping her outstretched hand. "No, I want to hear
the rest of the song," he said, still holding her hand
and staring at her. Her heart pumping wildly, Ellen
stood silently and listened to the rest of the song
with Kevin.
~~~~
I often fantasize
The stars above are watching you
They know my heart and speak to yours
Like only lovers do
If I could wear your clothes
I'd pretend I was you and lose control
There'll be some lovemaking, heartbreaking, soul
shaking
Oh lovemaking, heartbreaking, soul shaking, oh yeah
Running in and out my life has got me so confused
You gotta make the sacrifice
Somebody's got to choose
We can make it if we try for the sake of you and I
Together we can make it right
~~~~
Unnoticed by Kevin and Ellen as they stood listening
to the song, Mac had walked back into the living room
to ask Ellen if she'd prefer tea to coffee. He was
struck dumb and his mouth gaped open by the sight
before him; it was clear to him now the cause of the
tense moments encountered earlier in the evening.
"What in the world...?" Mac immediately turned
abruptly on his heels and quietly returned to the
kitchen.
"Kevin, please," Ellen gasped finally removing her
hand from Kevin's. She turned off the stereo. "If I
didn't know better and this wasn't one of those
digital stereo broadcasts, I would have said that you
arranged for that song to be played."
"It was the first time that I've heard that song,"
Kevin admitted, "but obviously you recognized it. It
is ironic that it was played, just now, isn't it?"
Ellen knew it would be impossible to sit over coffee
with Dara and Mac and continue as if nothing was go
on. "But nothing is going on," Ellen reminded herself.
However it was now time for her to discuss 'nothing'
with Kevin. Aloud she said, "We have to go now Kevin
and talk."
Kevin couldn't agree more. His façade was quickly
slipping and Mac, who knew him well, might pick up on
something. "I agree. Let's say goodnight."
Ellen went into the kitchen to give their apologies
for leaving early, and within a moment, Kevin joined
them. He had already put on his coat and he helped
Ellen into hers. In another minute they were gone from
the apartment. "What in the world happened?" Dara
asked, perplexed by Kevin and Ellen's sudden
departure.
Mac didn't want to lie to Dara. However, he didn't
want to say anything about what he had witnessed or
what Kevin said at the gym until he spoke to Kevin
again. Instead of responding directly he asked, "Has
Ellen mentioned any problems or anything that's
troubling her?"
"No, but we haven't spoken much this week. I'll try to
check with her later this weekend."
"You should do that Dara" Mac encouraged her, adding,
"She might need a friend right about now.?
Credit - Don't Let Go (Love), Sung by En Vogue,
written by Organized Noise, Andrea Martin, Ivan Matias