Chapter 5

Since she was at the police station Evangeline stopped in to see Nora. In New York she had picked up a scarf she thought Nora would like. Van handed her the festively wrapped package, "Post holiday gifts? Are you starting a new trend? Stop yourself."

"No. No. Blair and I enriched NY’s economy and all you got was this lousy gift!"

"You and Blair?"

"Yeah, next time you should come with us. We had a blast, or maybe we can all have a drink or dinner some time soon."

Nora leaned back in her chair looking up at Van, "I’m intrigued. How does John like the idea of you and Blair becoming fast friends? You already attract enough attention on your own; you and Blair together would be bookends of magnetic attention stirring men up."

"I’m sure I don’t know what you mean, bookends? Magnetic?"

"Don’t be coy and self-effacing with me, I doubt John wants you on the prowl with Blair now that she’s sans Todd and looking for comfort and trouble."

"I don’t prowl. Besides, her rants aside Blair will never be done with Todd. I’ll let you know when I set something up and you can prowl with us."

Evangeline goes to meet an appointment at the Country Club and runs into Blair and they discuss an outing with Nora. "Nora and I rub against each other, sometimes friendly sometimes not. We’ve dated the same men, but she really stepped up and supported me during the trial. I respect her, even if I don’t always like her. Sure, let’s do something the three of us sometime." Blair checks her watch and asks Van, "What are you doing now? Do you have to head right back to the office?"

"No, I have work to do at home later and I’ve already been to the courthouse. What are you thinking?"

"How do you feel about horseback riding? It’s a pretty day although a touch brisk, but very nice for January. I was thinking of going for a ride and I’d welcome the company."

"I love to ride but I’m rusty. I hear you’re the best rider around. I’m not sure I can keep up."

"I’m a great rider, and we’re not going for wild gallops. We’ll just go for a short ride. I have some clothes you can wear."

Van looked thoughtful then broke into a grin, "Sure. I’d love to, it’s just what I need. Lets go to the stables and pick out a horse for me, spirited but controllable."

"Spirited but controllable, the way you like your men?"

"…If they ask me how I would call your name/I’d say you’re a riff by Bird/and a solo by Coltrane/You’re the Mississippi River and the whole coast of Maine/You’re a golden ocean of Kansas grain/And you’re a lonely traveler/On a going-home train…"

With the horses cantering along Evangeline and Blair enjoyed the false warmth and rode in friendly silence. Van cast a look at Blair and decided to just ask what was on her mind, "So…how do you deal with Todd’s personality ticks? I mean he has a strong, kind of overwhelming presence and you’re a self-sufficient woman with strong views and feelings. He’s possessive, jealous and really obsessive about you and whatever his latest grudge is with whomever. He’s proud to be with you and proud of you but he wants you within close reach or under wraps in the penthouse."

"Oh yeah," laughed Blair, "That’s why he keeps making sure we’re working together, or in the same building, keeping us physically in close proximity. That’s just Todd. Actually, we do work well together. I gather that in some ways John and Todd are more alike than anyone would believe?"

"Underneath it all, yes, they seem to be. They invest all they have in the woman they’re with; and if they have her they really don’t feel compelled to interact much with anyone else, she’s the world, the stars, everything." Van stopped her horse, "How do you deal with all that focused intensity on you? Knowing you really do hold this man’s life, soul and well-being in your hands? How can you trust it—that it won’t burn itself out or incinerate one or both of you?"

"These grandly damaged men," Blair mused thoughtfully, "When you’re so ready to walk away and when you least expect it they’ll say or do something so…."

"Wonderful." They said in unison, "Exactly!" also said in unison.

"Evangeline, I doubt you and John are damaged the way Todd and I are, inclined to hurt each other just to see if the other person will keep coming back. I’m sure you both have your issues but I don’t think that’s how your problems play out in your relationship."

"True, but John is carrying such deep-seated pain. I want to make it better for him and some days I’m sure I can, other times I doubt anyone or anything can help him, least of all me. And some days he’s just infuriating and all I want is to slap him silly."

"You know Blair; we’re somewhat alike at our core. We’re frightened of being made a fool of and we don’t want to get hurt—worse decimated—by these men who claim such a hold over us that we can’t resist giving them the last bit of who we are. Even when we know we shouldn’t, even when we’re trying to resist their spell."

"I’ve tried for years and it’s just hopeless. I’m a fool for Todd, but not a public fool if I can help it. And when it’s good between us, just good mind you, it’s more intense, all-consuming and wonderful then with anyone else. And when things are great between us…my God! It defies description. I think you know exactly what I mean and so few people will ever have what we have."

While they talked the horses resumed a slow walk and without guidance circled back towards the stables. Van looked around, saw their direction and laughed, "We may not know what we want but the animals are clear: stables, warmth and food."

"Yes, and us off their backs so they can dish with their horsey pals." Blair said giggling.

Back at the stables they changed clothes, reaffirmed having a girls’ night out with Nora and said goodbye. Blair went to pick-up Jack and Starr from Dorian’s and Evangeline stopped by the law library on her way home. During the rest of the afternoon and early evening Van and John traded a few messages in anticipation of being together later that night.

Back | Next