Chapter 4

Evangeline decided to express her thoughts to John regarding what they had discussed earlier. She did tell Danielle that they wouldnít have any more talks, but she planned on this being one sided and she in complete control. After dinner she decided it was time to finish the conversation from earlier.

"Evangeline I want you to know that Iím not leaving, so donít ask. I am here to support you and we need to work through this relationship. I do not care how long it takes. We are expecting and I wonít walk away. I told you once before weíre worth fight for. I still believe that."

Evangeline corrected him, "Iím pregnant, and you can walk away, women have raised children on their own forever. I feel more alone now than I have ever before in my life. Thank you John, I opened myself up to youÖ she swallowed the lump in her throat and you betrayed me with Natalie.

Evangeline needed to pace; she stood up from the couch. John itís no wonder Natalie always pursued you. She had every right to think she had a chance with you and she disrespected me every chance she got.

John sat on the couch watching her pace as she expressed her thoughts with animated hand gestures. Every now and then she would glance at John. He did not have a defense. He just listened.

You know Natalie said some awful things to me, and I never told you about those comments. She made statements that I stole you from her, and that she deserved to be happy and if that meant having you, she would do anything she had to, to be with you.

I did not think I had to fight for you, I trusted you, and you told me I was the only one you wanted to be with, yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Time after time, I asked you about Natalie, and you knew she still had feelings for you and you did not clue me in. I could have handled her better if I knew, but insteadÖ I am a fool.

She stopped pacing and turned to John giving him her full attention. She waited for a response, he said, "You are not a fool, I am. Iím an idiot. I need to ask for your forgiveness and ask that you try to trust that I love you, and that I will give you all that I am. Iím here; and Iím not going anywhere."

John walks to Evangeline and wraps his arms around her waist and pulled her to his chest. Evangeline said, "Please let me go."

John did not release her. Instead, he leaned back and looked in her face. She looked up at his face and saw the tears pooling in his eyes.

"Please, Iím so sorry, Iím so sorry. I love you more than my life; I hurt you. I will always regret that. I told you once no one would ever hurt you again, and some how I managed to do that. Please give me a chance to fix this, fix us."

Evangeline arms took on a life of their own. It was like a force beyond her control made her reach up and wrap her arms around his neck, pulling his face down to hers. They connected forehead to forehead and relaxed, as the fading connection became stronger than it had been in long time.

Evangeline loves him and although he hurt her, she did not want him in pain. Evangeline spoke softly to him. "You can stay. I do need you and love you. We can work this out, but it will take time."

A smile spread across Johnís face and it lit up his entire face. His eyes sparkled. John held Evangelineís face between his hands and kissed her all over her face; In between kisses he said, "Thank you, thank you. I love you."

Evangeline held Johnís face in her hands and kissed him, this time she did not hold back. John held her tighter to him. She yawned and John took her hand and led her back to bed. He lay on the bed with her. They lay together face to face. John stroked her face and hair, marveling at her beauty. He rained soft and sweet kissing all over her face and neck. He stroked her back. He took the time to cherish her, wanting her to understand without a doubt, that he loves her. They fell asleep facing each other, her face in his chest, wrapped in his arms, his head rested on top of hers.

Evangeline woke first the next morning. She was having her first serious bout of morning sickness. She tried to get out of Johnís embrace, but he held her tighter as she moved against him.

"John," She whispered not wanting to startle him, John. Let me go! I need to get up." He did not let go, so she screamed.

"He sat up quickly and jumped off the bed, into a fighting stance. "Whatís wrong, what happened?"

"Nothing she said as she reached the bathroom."

He heard her vomiting. He walked and stood at the entrance to the bathroom. He grabbed a hand towel and ran cold water over it, ready to hand it to her when she was finished. He would have gone to her, but was afraid that if he saw the vomit, he might vomit as well. John has seen some of the most vile, gruesome things during his career, but vomit, it did him in always has. She flushed the toilet and John handed her the towel as she stood up from the toilet. She wiped her mouth, brushed her teeth and then washed her hands.

John asked Evangeline, "Are you all right?"

"No, but I we will be."

John asked, "Why did you scream?" Evangeline said, "I was trying to get up to go to the bathroom, but you held me tighter. I didnít want to vomit in the bedroom.

" He looked sheepishly and said. "Sorry."

She walked past him out of the bathroom and sat on the black leather loveseat. "John, I need to tell you something Iíve been thinking about. We need to start all over again."

"What do you mean, start all over?"

"We need to go out on more dates, no sex. She heard him groan, when she said no sex.

I do not think you know how compassionate you really are. Your capacity for love is so amazing. You say you do not know what love is; but John that is not true. I could not make you see the love you have inside. You need to discover that on your on. I want you to know that you have had it all the long."

Evangeline woke up to morning sickness again, but that didnít matter she was excited.

She is off bed rest. Danielle gave her permission to go into the office, provided she took a nap during the day and stayed calm, nothing stressful, especially no court cases.

John went to the station and decided to get Natalie squared away. John wanted to talk privately to Natalie, but this should be said publicly, because most of her advances where done publicly, besides a few witnesses would be smart.

John stopped by Natalieís desk and said "I need to tell you something and I need you to hear me."

She beamed, "Sure John. "

"Our friendship has meant a lot to me, but we canít be friends anymore. I need you to lean on your family from now on. Evangeline and I are committed to each other and she comes first. I cannot run to you every time you need me. I am not your soul mate, or you knight in shining armor. Evangeline is my soul mate. I love her more than my life. I am sorry if this hurts you, but I have told you all the long that we are friends only. I donít believe I ever gave you any other impression and if I did, I did not realize it. We will have police protection for you, until the "Killing Club Killer" is caught, and of course Bo is here for you."

"But, John. Why are you doing this?"

"Natalie I have said all Iím going to say, please do not call me anymore, or hang out in my office. We will have a professional working relationship, that is all. Oh, and please stop telling Evangeline that she stole me from you, we were never in a relationship."

John went into his office, and shut the door. Natalie looked stunned. Her mind went to work; she was going to confront Evangeline. Just then Evangeline walked into the squad room, looking stunning as ever, she had a glow about her and it added to her beauty. Of course it did not matter what she wore, she was walking perfection in word, in deed and in looks. Classy was definitely a word to describe her.

"Evangeline I would like to speak with you. How dare you tell John not to be my friend anymore. I know he loves me, we shared a connection."

Evangeline said, "I never told John to stop being your friend, and you shared a connection, past tense. You moved on and so did he. John and I are meant to be. Iím sorry that you are hurting. Please excuse me."

Natalie grabbed Evangeline by the arm, and Evangeline asked her to let go. When Natalie refused Evangeline pulled her arm free, and that caused Natalie to stumble backwards a bit. When she got her footing she stomped towards Evangeline ready to smack her. Natalieís hand was stopped in mid air by Johnís hand. An officer went to Johnís office to let him know what was going on in the squad room.

Natalie looked shocked and in disbelief that John would protect Evangeline. "Natalie, if you ever try that again, I will lock you up myself."

"John, why are you protecting her, she took you from me. We belong together."

"You were my friend, but we can no longer be friends. Didnít anything I say this morning register?" Evangeline comes first before anything or anyone else. Please accept what I have said. My priority is Evangeline."

"Evangeline doesnít get you, weíre the same, we come from the same place. I donít understand how you canít see this?"

Bo came out of his office hearing Natalie raised voice in the squad room. "Natalie thatís enough. John, Evangeline Iím so sorry about all of this. Natalie I need to see you in my office."

"Thank you Bo. If you will excuse us."

John asked Evangeline if she was all right. "Iím fine John, but it is a bit scary how out of touch with reality she is." He took her hand and walked to his office.

"I could have handled Natalie you know."

"I am your protector, and I will fight your battles. Natalie could have hurt you and the babies." John sat on the edge of his desk; he pulled her to him and kissed her forehead. John closed his eyes and hugged her with all the love heíd been denying her.

"Weíre fine John she wheezed out, but I need to breathe. He released her some

"Thank you."

"Evangeline last night I had a dream that you were in danger and I was running toward your voice trying to find you. You kept calling me; but I couldnít find you. I tried to reassure you, calling out to you that I love you. I couldnít image not ever seeing you again. I died inside. I could not live without you in my life. "Iíve made a decision. Iím moving in with you or we can find a house together. I am not going to miss another second of my childrenís life. I hope you will not challenge me on this. You wonít win.

"Is that a dare Lieutenant? You know how I love a dare."

"Oh really." He said while flashing that sexy smile.

"Yes, really, she smiled just as sexy."

John wanted to reach out and move that piece of rebellious hair, thatís teasing her face but resisted the temptation. He knew that if he touched her hair, he would want to touch more of her and then make love to her.

"I wonít challenge you on this, I would love see you in the morning. Letís find a house together. We can look through the real estate ads this weekend."

John stood up grab his jacket to leave. "Where are you going John?í

"To get some things from my place. Iím moving in today, before you change your mind. You know mood swings and all."

"Whatever", she laughed.

Evangeline watched John pack up some things and he said, "Evangeline Williamson, I love you with my whole heart and soul." Evangeline started to cry. John pulled her up from the couch and hugged her and repeated, "I love you."

John cups her face while he kisses her forehead, then her cheeks. He holds back a split-second while studying her face, and then he takes her lips with all the love and passion that has been pent up in him for weeks.

Evangeline resisted, while his tongue teased her lips coaxing them to open for him. Evangelineís gave in. She stood up on her toes to lean in more to John. Her arms wrapped around Johnís neck for support. His kisses always make her weak in the knees. John walks her backwards to the bed. Without breaking the kiss lowers them the bed. He taking off his jacket, while rubbing her back he unzipped her dress. They need air, so their lips part.

Evangeline I want to make love to you, can we make love? Is it OK? Will it hurt you or the babies? She looked perplexed and sat up. "John I am in love with you, and I want you too, but I need some time. Iím not ready. You hurt me, and I canít trust my heart to you, yet.

John released Evangeline, but he did not move away, he rested his forehead against hers. John kissed her forehead, before he rose off the bed to finish packing. John zipped Evangelineís dress up and she went back to sit on the couch fighting back tears. She knew John wasnít thrilled with her words, but she needed to protect her heart.

When they returned to Evangelineís apartment she went straight to bed. Evangeline woke in the middle of the night hungry. She fell asleep hours earlier without eating. John wasnít in the apartment; he must be at the station. She went to the kitchen and pulled out the ice cream. Then she pulled out the pizza. She sat down on the couch in the living room, contented.

John came in the front door, surprised to see her up so late.

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

"What are you doing up?"

" I was hungry. Would you like to join me?"

"Congratulations on winning "Women of the Year", he had the newspaper from earlier in the day with the story in it. "No one deserves it more than you."

"Thank you. Did you still want to escort me?"

"Definitely, just tell me what to wear."

"Well the award ceremony is tomorrow night at 7:00 PM, and a suit and tie will be fine. Iím happy Iím not obviously pregnant. What kind of example would I be, if those honoring me knew I was an unmarried pregnant women?"

John thought about her words, and he decided that right now was not the best time for him to mention marriage. Marriage has been on his mind, since finding out Evangeline is expecting. He wants a whole family, with strings and paper. He knew Evangeline would resist, but he would convince her that marriage could work out, if true love is involved.

The awards ceremony came quickly. John escorted Evangeline. She had on a beautiful black spaghetti strap dress that had gathering at the waist pinned by a small black sequenced flower giving it a sarong look, but the best thing is that it hid her pooched abdomen.

Shortly after arriving, John got a call that Natalie was in danger; the killer is after her again. Evangeline became sad as she thought about John running off to rescue Natalie again. She told John she understood, and excused herself to go to the ladies room.

Evangeline had the feeling she was being watched. She shook it off. She reached to push the bathroom door in and she was chloroformed from behind. She dropped her purse.

When John reached the Palace hotel and restaurant, he spotted Rex. "Where is Natalie, Rex?"

"Well, the truth is I convinced Natty to set her self up, so you would come rescue her. Sheís not in danger."

John was furious, that once again he left the women he loved to go after Natalie. Just then his cell phone rang. It was Lisa Williamson. "John is Evangeline with you?"

"No, I left her at the award ceremony, she was on her way to the Ladies room."

"They are ready to begin, but she canít be found, someone found her person by the Ladies room."

"Iím on my way." John was out of his mind with worry; he would deal with Rex and Natalie later.

John received a cryptic call. "I have someone or should I say women you love."

"What do you mean women?"

"Which one lives, which one dies? Evangeline or Natalie?"

John had the wind knocked out of him, when he heard Evangelineís name. "Where are they? "

He arrived back at the awardís ceremony and informed Bo, about the call from the killer. Now he had to tell Evangelineís mother that her daughter was kidnapped by a serial killer. He felt unbelievable guilt, but could not give into it. He had to find the woman he loved, the mother of his children. The ceremony was canceled until further notice. The whole police force was put on alert. John received another call to come alone to an abandoned high school. He informed Bo, but ask him to hold back, he would call when he arrived, but to send in the officers in plain clothes and unmarked cars. When John arrived he couldnít believe what he saw.

Evangeline and Natalie were dressed in cheer leading uniforms and gagged and bound to a pole. They were set on wood and cardboard boxes and fires were set at the base of what they were standing on. He rushed to Evangeline, but Natalie seemed to be in more danger as her fire was approaching her quickly. John was paralyzed with fear. He had to make a life and death decision. Who do I rescue? His decision would mean one of the women could possibly die.